Saturday – Zurich

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I am woken by a buzzing in my ear that sounds like a thousand pneumatic drills in the room. As i rub the sleep from my eyes I realise that we have majorly overslept, I grumble something unintelligible at Dan to wake him and see why my phone has been going off. It’s a message from Frankie asking what room number we are in because Jay has been wandering the halls of the third floor for half an hour trying random room but unable to find ours. I explain to her that our room is actually on the fourth floor and give her the room number.


I go to take a quick shower and recoil at the smell Dan has left in the bathroom… The joys of sharing a room.

I come back into the room to find Jay sprawled across my bed, ripping chunks off of a whole chicken, the grease is dripping all over my duvet and sheets. I call him on this and with a grin he tells me that they were already there before he started eating. That’s what friends, or at least mild employer/employee relationships are for i guess.

We have a bit of time before we can get into the convention hall so we head over the road for a quick coffee and Jay’s second breakfast. The waitress finds my attempt at ordering in German hilarious and I feel that we missed a joke at our expense as we take our seats. In contrast to yesterday’s beautiful, summer, The hill are alive, type weather, it is more like being back home. There is a slight drizzle and it is over cast.

I attempt to interview Jay and dan about the convention and travel and how they feel it is going, it is less than productive, I decide that if i am to get anything of worth for the documentary then i will have to be more sneaky!

We arrive at the convention hall a little bit more prepared today, I have nabbed the kettle from the hotel room and robbed the maid’s cart for coffee, tea and milk. Unfortunately though, the pillows we had borrowed from the room, against their rules, (FIGHT THE POWER!) which we had wrapped in black bags mainly to protect them against the ink spills but partly to not get caught, had been mistaken for rubbish and thrown away… Oops!

Oh well, at this point I am sure that we have gotten all the bad luck out of the way and it will be smooth sailing…

The tattoo gun doesn’t work… We check the batteries and then do all the useless fixing techniques. Turn them on and off again, wiggle the bits that can be wiggled, check that other bits which shouldn’t wiggle still aren’t wiggling, and then hit and curse it! And by the engineering gods it worked, back on track and only a few minutes behind schedule we crack on. Dan is still a bit sore from yesterday but he grins and bears it, todays viewing pleasure ‘The Princess Diaries’ or possible something more manly… not really sure tbh.

On stage are some incredible BMX performers, amazing to watch them do tricks in such a small space. Today is the main day of the event and the crowd is buzzing, it takes me nearly fifteen minutes just to push my way back to the stand.

Jay is too busy to take a lunch break and so it is with a sad heart that I must take his artist’s slip down to the canteen. OH MY FUCKING GOD!!! I tuck in to the biggest fucking meal that I can possible get down me, the first proper meal i have had since I have been here, salad, rolls pasta, I leave waddling back upstairs feeling like I want to take a nap. Straight in to the second round of the tattoo queen contest… Such a hard life this business.

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The afternoon passes by very quickly with barely a moments rest, answering questions which can get a bit ‘samey’ as many people ask the same thing but it is still nice to stumble through conversations in a variety of languages.

The diversity is the amazing aspect to these conventions that one simply does not get in regular life. Huge bikers, house wives, ravers, kids, goths and glamour models. just such a range of people that give us so many interesting views in life.

We finish late again and stagger off to bed, we back on the tele in Jay’s room, ‘The living day lights’ my favourite Bond film, bit of Dalton for the win! We now have the top and the bottom of the tattoo done, tomorrow will be the knee! Ouch! We have to decide what it is we are doing to connect the two. I zone out completely until I hear the unforgivable words from Jay ‘Dalton’s a shit Bond.’

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I snap my attention back to the conversation and let rip on Jay, I have jokingly called my boss many names but this time there was a venom and anger that couldn’t not be contained. I feel like a viking warrior, once my weapon has been outĀ it cannot be sheathed until it has tasted blood. Jay and Dan are left mouths ajar as I calm myself by counting to ten It’s been a long day.

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